This is the essence of the “paternalistic” mindset, is it not? That to give the child something “he does not deserve” will establish a bad habit we don’t want him to have.

Yet this also transfers, later, to the parent of that child, even the impoverished parent. We also will not give to that parent, even the parent with that child, two or three, or four children or more, thinking that same thing, that we do not want him developing such a bad habit.

But at what point is it a good thing to prevent a bad habit and at what point is the person, child or adult, grown enough to know better than to develop bad habits and simply NEED HELP? And who are we, on the outside, from such a distance, to judge?

If we have it to spare, at what point do we say, simply say, "YES"?

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